Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Behold: The Piano Horn
Sunday we traveled around, had lunch with Neal Chawla, and then proceeded to buy toys for ourselves. We went to Terra Toys so Maggie could buy origami paper. There, in the toy instrument section, for six dollars, was this finely crafted plastic beauty:
"Behold: It is the Piano Horn come before you."
I know, you can't believe it either. I took it out of the box and all it took was one richly expressive note. I knew: this was worth six dollars for sure.
So what is it? The box says it is "two instruments in one." This is misleading. It is definitely only one instrument. You blow into it and press keys down. It sounds a little like a harmonica, but it's easier to play. The notes start at G, but it's the C scale. So it's like the white keys on the piano, for not quite a two octave range. It's like a cheap melodica! This thing can really blow and stun the ladies.
"The Piano Horn is refined, and often wants for a pipe."
I know, you can't believe it either. I took it out of the box and all it took was one richly expressive note. I knew: this was worth six dollars for sure.
So what is it? The box says it is "two instruments in one." This is misleading. It is definitely only one instrument. You blow into it and press keys down. It sounds a little like a harmonica, but it's easier to play. The notes start at G, but it's the C scale. So it's like the white keys on the piano, for not quite a two octave range. It's like a cheap melodica! This thing can really blow and stun the ladies.
"The Piano Horn is refined, and often wants for a pipe."
It's not limited to one note, either. The Piano Horn is a versatile instrument, for sure. Why is it only six dollars? Why is such a powerful tool of music creation hidden away on the top shelf of the instrument section at Terra Toys? I was about to buy a jaw harp with a picture of Snoopy on the box before I noticed this! Why don't we all have Piano Horns? Surely some company could make an electric one with a low-pass filter and built-in delay. Also, it could use a spit valve, like other fine instruments.
How big is it? It's BIG. It's bigger than my toy glockenspiel AND my tinwhistle. It's louder, too.
How big is it? It's BIG. It's bigger than my toy glockenspiel AND my tinwhistle. It's louder, too.
The Piano Horn: It's way big. Bigger than me.
But what does it sound like in a bad musical composition with other toys? To find out, my team and I worked day and night, determining that the piano horn was a little flat as far as tuning went, but would still sound OK in a mix. We also determined, through rigorous testing, that many toy instruments are, shockingly, not perfectly tuned! It's something we have to work with. We tracked two Piano Horns and added some stereo toy glockenspiel. To fill out some sound we threw in a finely crafted toy accordion on gracious loan from Miss Julie. Drums were added and some synth bass (there you may notice some of the other instruments "flatness").
This is what we came up with, through the scientific method.
Piano Horn and Friends
Due to the nature of the Piano Horn, this tune can't help but sound distinguished and expressive. Its notes soar, like lofty birds from some elegant dimension not quite our own--birds on an unfathomable, ephemeral trek, full of magic and light, yet tinged with a wan sense that endings are soon to be and no flight, however majestic, is forever.
Still, go out and find your own piano horn. Perhaps, some day, many people with piano horns will meet, and an orchestra of aching brilliance will be formed. This is our hope! All together now--
This is what we came up with, through the scientific method.
Piano Horn and Friends
Due to the nature of the Piano Horn, this tune can't help but sound distinguished and expressive. Its notes soar, like lofty birds from some elegant dimension not quite our own--birds on an unfathomable, ephemeral trek, full of magic and light, yet tinged with a wan sense that endings are soon to be and no flight, however majestic, is forever.
Still, go out and find your own piano horn. Perhaps, some day, many people with piano horns will meet, and an orchestra of aching brilliance will be formed. This is our hope! All together now--
Friday, June 16, 2006
The Sweetness: Music Nerd Blog
Per Murf's request, I'm putting up some tracks from James and me's new Sweetness CD. (Since Murf hasn't gotten his copy yet.)
The way we rolled for this Sweetness outing was old school. Pretty much, we'd hit the record button and start playing and singing, partially to keep it real, and partially because making songs that way is much faster. You pretty much cut out all that pesky time wasted thinking about composition and content. Who needs to worry about that? For some reason, I think because James forgot his acoustic guitar so we were working with one acoustic and one bass, the songs sounded a little thin--like they were quick notes jotted down for what songs could be. Once James left, I fattened up the tracks some, adding drums or flutes or guitars or synths. Whatever the song needed to feel a little more full. I tried to make it feel as natural as I could, and I think I succeeded. Me and James were both floored by the results.
I also did some mixing and mastering, making it so the songs were all about the same level, etc. Like I said, we're very pleased. James said it might be our best. BUT! To reiterate, mostly they were done on the fly, pretty much the same way we did the very first Sweetness. It just sounds better because we have a little more knowledge about recording, etc.
So what I'm putting up are two songs, in the original versions and the mastered versions. That is, one version will just be me and James, guitar and bass and vocals, and the other version will have the final touches I put on them. They're still bad songs done badly; we just got a little better at disguising that fact. But just a little.
Lady - Original Mix This was a lame toss-off rock song with a bit of weirdness at the end, and a puppy that's four sheets to the wind.
Lady We didn't think too much of this song until it got drums and electric guitar. Now it rocks.
Yo Soy de Aqui - Original Mix James had the music before, and adlibbed some bad spanish phrases. Hilarious? Or horrible?
Yo Soy de Aqui I thought what this song was missing was atmosphere, so I added a lot of tracks, flutes and shakers and cymbals and drums you can barely hear and synths. And I gave James a dash of really short echo for flavor. Also, the original had a sort of dramatic rising action, but our performance did not. So I tried to give it a swell. James flipped, because it sounds sweet.
There are nine more tracks!
The way we rolled for this Sweetness outing was old school. Pretty much, we'd hit the record button and start playing and singing, partially to keep it real, and partially because making songs that way is much faster. You pretty much cut out all that pesky time wasted thinking about composition and content. Who needs to worry about that? For some reason, I think because James forgot his acoustic guitar so we were working with one acoustic and one bass, the songs sounded a little thin--like they were quick notes jotted down for what songs could be. Once James left, I fattened up the tracks some, adding drums or flutes or guitars or synths. Whatever the song needed to feel a little more full. I tried to make it feel as natural as I could, and I think I succeeded. Me and James were both floored by the results.
I also did some mixing and mastering, making it so the songs were all about the same level, etc. Like I said, we're very pleased. James said it might be our best. BUT! To reiterate, mostly they were done on the fly, pretty much the same way we did the very first Sweetness. It just sounds better because we have a little more knowledge about recording, etc.
So what I'm putting up are two songs, in the original versions and the mastered versions. That is, one version will just be me and James, guitar and bass and vocals, and the other version will have the final touches I put on them. They're still bad songs done badly; we just got a little better at disguising that fact. But just a little.
Lady - Original Mix This was a lame toss-off rock song with a bit of weirdness at the end, and a puppy that's four sheets to the wind.
Lady We didn't think too much of this song until it got drums and electric guitar. Now it rocks.
Yo Soy de Aqui - Original Mix James had the music before, and adlibbed some bad spanish phrases. Hilarious? Or horrible?
Yo Soy de Aqui I thought what this song was missing was atmosphere, so I added a lot of tracks, flutes and shakers and cymbals and drums you can barely hear and synths. And I gave James a dash of really short echo for flavor. Also, the original had a sort of dramatic rising action, but our performance did not. So I tried to give it a swell. James flipped, because it sounds sweet.
There are nine more tracks!
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Tennessee!
Has Michael been lost in a dense forest of vicious, super-intelligent cane?
Me and Maggie have been in Tennessee for a whole week, and now we're back in the Texas. It's good to be home, mostly to sleep in my own bed, with its nice, firm mattress and its flat pillows. But we had a really good time! We got to visit with a lot of good people. We got blitzed (Maggie more than me, I had to drive) at midnight sushi, and ended up drinking and talking afterwards till four in the morning with Andrew and James. We went canoeing down the Harpeth river, which was fun even if we didn't flip over at all.
The highlight of the trip was Lisa's wedding. I did a competent job of giving her away, I guess. (That was my second time giving a bride away, if I have a daughter I will so have that job in the bag.) Lisa's wedding reception was one heck of a party. They had barbecue and margaritas and kegs of beer. They also had, if only for a short time:
David Neel: Man among men. Even a brief visit with King Dave brings joy to all. I touched his belly.
Greg and Kim were there, but I don't have a funny picture of me rubbing either of their bellies to post. I'm sorry. Andrew Haun and Jingping (is that one word or two Andrew?) were there. Andrew! She's very cute! Bring her back.
Some high lights of the reception include: Me, Maggie, James, and Carlos all doing our first keg-stands; drinking alcohol on the front steps of a historical landmark (and haunted house); me schooling James and Carlos at a foot race (we were drinking and it seemed like a good idea, and it was! We raced several times. I won them all, mwa ha ha. James rolled head-over-heels in the first race, it was funny. Why did we have a race? I said, "Hey, I'll race you guys to those trees over there." The trees were about 100 yards away. James and Carlos said okay. Somebody counted on you mark, get set, go. Of course when they said go no one moved, so I decided to run all out since no one would be expecting that. James and Carlos followed suit. Carlos quickly stopped, and James fell something crazy because he was trying to put his cell phone and keys in a cargo pocket at the same time. He promptly demanded a rematch. It was great.) Me and Lisa had an all-out, no holds barred "robot" dance-off to "Domo Arrigato Mr. Roboto." Lisa was declared the well-deserved winner, but during out dance we had the floor to ourselves and a captive audience. Go Allen Siblings!
Did Maggie take a midnight spin on James' hog? Or is this a cleverly posed photograph?
Did Andrew participate in a thrilling jazz piano duel with Michael? Was it a tender-hearted Duet? Or was it merely lame?
In other news, I got a new job, and on July first, I will become a bank teller with many less customers to deal with, no soccer moms ordering Starbucks drinks that aren't on the menu, and plenty of time to read books on the clock, all to the tune of $1.39 more an hour. Sweet!
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Update-City.
Geez, It's been a long time since I posted. I guess I've been busy! James and Andrew came to visit and we had a damned fine time. We went here:
That's Hamilton pool from inside the overhang. We went swimming here and it was super cool. Here's the thing from beach-side:
We also saw the movie Showgirls at the drafthouse (for comedy, it was the Sinus Show.) We grilled out and drank beer, ate cookies, etc. Me and James had some sweet times playing some music.
Since then I've been taking it easy, playing Dragon Quest 8 again, and overdubbing and mixing down about ten or so mysterious songs for some CD or another that, I hear, some weirdo with a little too much time might have made a stupid teaser for some other weirdos that will get this CD when somebody, I don't even know, comes to some other such state that isn't Texas but still starts with a T. I hear. And I don't know, word is (from somewhere or another) that somebody, maybe named Ian, really needs not one, but two different CDs mailed to him(or was that three, or four?), and some other dude I heard about assures this so-called Ian that he hasn't forgotten, but he might have forgotten the adress to send this CDs somebody might have talked about or so on and such and such. Supposedly.
We are excited about coming to Tennessee next week.
That's Hamilton pool from inside the overhang. We went swimming here and it was super cool. Here's the thing from beach-side:
We also saw the movie Showgirls at the drafthouse (for comedy, it was the Sinus Show.) We grilled out and drank beer, ate cookies, etc. Me and James had some sweet times playing some music. Since then I've been taking it easy, playing Dragon Quest 8 again, and overdubbing and mixing down about ten or so mysterious songs for some CD or another that, I hear, some weirdo with a little too much time might have made a stupid teaser for some other weirdos that will get this CD when somebody, I don't even know, comes to some other such state that isn't Texas but still starts with a T. I hear. And I don't know, word is (from somewhere or another) that somebody, maybe named Ian, really needs not one, but two different CDs mailed to him(or was that three, or four?), and some other dude I heard about assures this so-called Ian that he hasn't forgotten, but he might have forgotten the adress to send this CDs somebody might have talked about or so on and such and such. Supposedly.
We are excited about coming to Tennessee next week.
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